Tommy Cooper jokes

English is renowned for its one-liners and subtle humor. Here are some instances showcasing how basic grammar topics turn hilariously amusing when fused with the skill and timing of the late Tommy Cooper.


I knocked on the door at this bed & breakfast and a lady stuck her head out of the window and said:

'What do you want'?

I said, 'I want to stay here'.

She said, 'Well... stay there' and shut the window.


live in a place for a short time as a visitor

not move away from a place

A man came round in hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, “Doctor, doctor, I can’t feel my legs!” The doctor replied, “I know you can’t, I’ve cut your arms off”.


experience something physical or emotional

touch something in order to discover something about it

Yesterday, someone even complimented my driving. They left a little note on the windshield, it said "Parking Fine".


adv good

noun an amount of money that has to be paid as a punishment

Two men walk into a building … you’d think at least one of them would have seen it.


to enter (a room or a building)

to collide with something while walking